Part 13

<Had you been scooping (silver) from Bathan *, you would not have pledged more than that. *

A dowry that is light upon the husband is a sign of blessing for the bride. ‘A’ishah (45) reported that Allah’s Messenger () said:

WL garry Spey YB e ants cL gcadad “pend SLI gad Ge Glo

1 Recorded by Muslim, an-Nasa’, and others.

2 Name of a valley in al-Madinah.

3 Recorded by al-Hakim and Ahmad. Verified to be authentic by al-Albani (asSahthah no. 2173).

4 Recorded by Abt Dawid, Ibn Majah, and others. Verified to be authentic by alAlbani (Sahih ul-Jami‘ no. 3279, 3300, as-Sahihah no. 1842, & Irwa’ul-Ghalil no.

3 Recorded by Ahmad, al-Hakim, and others. Verified to be hasan by al-Albani (Sahil ul-Jami no. 2235 & Irwa’ ul-Ghalil no. 1928).

If the marriage contract is executed without specifying a mahr, that does not forfeit the wife’s right to it.

“Indeed, Allah’s Messenger (&) gave me so-and-so in marriage but I did not then give her anything. Be my witnesses that I now give her as mahr my share from Khaybar.”

So she took that share and sold it for one hundred-thousand. b

‘Ulqumah (4%) reported that some people came to “Abdullah Bin Mas‘iid (445) and asked him about a case where one of them married a woman without naming a mahr for her and he died before consummating the marriage. “Abdullah said, “Since I departed from Allah’s Messenger (8), I have not been asked a harder question. Go ask someone else.” They kept trying to get an answer from him for one month, at the end of which they said, “Whom would we ask if we do not ask you, and you are one of the most esteemed of Muhammad’s (#) companions in this land, and we cannot find anyone else?” He said, “I will try to give you my best opinion in her regard. If it is right, that would be from Allah alone Who has no partners. And if it is wrong, that would be from me and from Satan, and Allah and His Messenger would be clear from it.” Then he said:

LL all Ugly Baall Gules aba Vy GaSy Y cLgiled Glo Yd”

1 Recorded by Abia Dawid, Ibn Hibban, and others. Verified to be authentic by alAlbani (rwa’ul-Ghalil no. 1924).

Quest for Love & Mercy 7s The Marriage Contract

“She should be given a mahr similar to that of other women of her family (or social status), without increase or reduction, and she should accomplish the ‘iddah (of four months and ten days), and she should be given her share of the inheritance.”

Some individuals from the tribe of Ashja‘ were then present, and one of them, called Ma‘qil Bin Sinan al-Ashja‘, stood and said:

“T testify that your judgment is similar to what Allah’s Messenger (8) judged in regard to a woman of ours called Bari’ Bint Washiq.”

Since embracing Islam, “Abdullah Bin Mas‘td was never seen as pleased as he was when he heard this. '

From the above reports we conclude that if, at wedding, a woman was not assigned a mahr, or if her mahr was too small compared to her husband’s situation and the mahrs that are usually given to other women of her status, that does not forfeit her right to a fair mahr. She may then dispute that with the Islamic authorities.

Therefore, extreme care should be taken by the woman’s wali to make sure that his principal is given a fair mahr at the time of martiage. If she then chooses to give up part or all of it to the husband, she should do that voluntarily and knowingly.

DOWRIES OF THE MOTHERS OF THE BELIEVERS The mahr that the Prophet (&$) gave to his wives varied from one to

another. In the case of Safiyyah (Ww), her dowry was emancipation from slavery. Anas (4) reported:

“The Prophet (8) freed Safiyyah (and married her); and

1 Recorded by Abi Dawid, an-Nasai7, and others. Verified to be authentic by alAlbant (Irwa’ul-Ghalil no, 1939).

her freedom was her dowry.”

Umm Habibah (\) reported that she was married to ‘Ubayd Ullah Bin Jahsh, and he died when they were at al-Habashah (Abyssinia). So an-Najashi (the Abyssinian king) gave her to Allah’s Messenger (8) in marriage. On behalf of Allah’s Messenger (), an-Najasht gave her four thousand (dirhams) as mahr, and he then sent her to him with Sharhabil Bin Hasanah. ?

Thus, Umm Habibah’s mahr was quite large. But it was not given to her by the Prophet (8) himself. Rather, it was a gift from anNajashi on his behalf. In all other cases, the mahr that Allah’s Messenger (&$) gave to his wives did not exceed five hundred dirhams.

Abi Salamah ‘Abd ur-Rahman reported that he asked ‘Mishah (tw), “How much was the sadaq that Allah’s Messenger (&) gave?” She replied:

“His sadaq to his wives was twelve and a half iigiyyahs.” *

“Do not be excessive in regard to the women’s dowries.”

“Had that been an indication of honor in this life or taqwa before Allah, the Prophet (&) would have been most worthy of it among you. Yet, Allah’s Messenger (8%) did not give as dowry to any of his wives, nor did any of his daughters receive more than

1 Recorded by al-Bukhari, Muslim, and others.

2 Recorded by Aba Dawid, an-Nasa’i, and others. Verified to be authentic by alAlbani (Sahih Abi Dawiid no. 1853).

3 Recorded by Muslim and others.

Quest for Love & Mercy 77 The Marriage Contract

twelve agiyyahs.” ' WEaK Story: “a WoMAN Is RIGHT AND ‘Umar Is WaonG”

It is important to warn against a weak story that is alleged to have taken place between ‘Umar and a woman, and even to note that some great scholars, such as Ibn Taymiyyah (#5), have quoted this story without realizing its weakness.

“O Commander of the Believers! You just forbade the people from being excessive in dowries. Why would you prevent us from receiving something that Allah (8) gave us?”

CHS es Sagal pas! ol

(ass Sh S| AS Ye Lal CO Sine UG Ey! Jil a ab alse

Upon hearing this, ‘Umar said (two or three times), “All people have a better understanding than “Umar. Indeed, a woman is right and ‘Umar is wrong!” Then he went back to the minbar and addressed the people saying:

1 Recorded by Abii Dawid, an-Nasa’l, and others. Verified to be authentic by alAlbani (/rwa*ul-Ghalil no. 1927).

“Indeed, I had forbidden you from being excessive in the women’s dowries. But now I say: let every man do with his wealth as he pleases.” !

After indicating the weakness of this report, al-Albant (aS) said:

“Furthermore, the woman’s quotation of this dyah is out of place. The dyah refers to a woman who is divorced without reason. It means, ‘If you wish to substitute a new wife for a previous one that you dislike and have no patience to treat with kindness — even though she did not commit any obvious sin, and if you had previously given her a large amount of money — whether she had received it all or you had pledged it to her, making it a debt owed by you to her, do not take back any of it. Rather, you should leave it all to its rightful owner. You only wish to substitute her with another woman for the sake of your desire and enjoyment, and not for any shar‘t reason that would have permitted your taking some of her money — such as her demanding separation, thereby hurting you by forcing you to divorce her. If she did not do anything like that, how can you take any of her money?” ” ?

This story is commonly cited by speakers and writers, trying thereby to prove a variety of points, some being absolutely false. Among the false conclusions are the following:

X It is permissible to demand excessive dowries.

& There is nothing wrong with women standing in a masjid and correcting the imam or other speakers.

1 This is a combined report recorded by Abii Ya'la, al-Bayhaqt, and “Abd ur-Razzaq, It is declared to be extremely weak by al-Albani (/nwa’ul-Ghalil no. 1927 & Raf ul-Malam pp. 33-34).

2 Commentary on Raf‘ ul-Malam ‘an il-A’immat il-A'lam pp. 34-35.

Quest for Love & Mercy 719 The Marriage Contract

% Women may give public addresses to a mixed audience,

% No scholar of Isldm deserves much respect, because even a common woman may easily expose his mistakes.

% Women should be allowed as members, or even heads, of religious councils, such as shiira boards of Islamic centers and organizations.

A POSSIBLE REASON FOR DESTRUCTION

Demanding from the husband mahr and gifts more than what he can afford could be a reason for destruction. If that becomes a standard practice among Muslims, it would inevitably lead some men to fall into theft, bribery, gambling, and other prohibited means in order to satisfy the greed of their wives and families. This would eventually destroy the whole society.