5. Would you like to meet him outside the institution? (cont.)

They passed by some people who said, "Look at these two foolish people! They are walking whilst no one is riding the donkey! Why was the donkey created if not to be mounted on?" Juha screamed, and dragged his son. They sat beneath the donkey and lifted it up on their shoulders! If I had been with him at the time, I would have said to him, "Dear beloved, do as you please and do not care about what others have to say. Pleasing others is an unachievable objective." Some people do not think thoroughly about their views before suggesting them to others. For example, one of them will come to you after you have been married and say, "Why didn't you propose to such and such woman? Why didn't you marry her?" At this point, you feel like erupting in his face, saying, "Dear brother! I have already got married! End of discussion! No one asked you for your suggestions!" Or he would come to you after you have sold you car and Do not care about what people say say, "If only you were to have informed me earlier! So-and-so would have paid you more." You would say in response, "Dear brother, enough! I have already sold my car and that is the end of the story. Do not distract me by making me look back!" Generally speaking, A man is never without an opponent Even if he lives alone on a mountain peak Do not punish yourself. Experience One of the predecessors said, "The one who subjects his religion to argumentation changes his opinions very often!" Do not care about what people say (58) Smile and keep smiling I have known a person for years, as he is one of my work colleagues. Would you believe me if I tell you that to this day I do not know if he has teeth or not! He is constantly frowning and sulking, as if smiling may decrease his age or wealth! Jarir bin 'Abdullah al-Bajali said, "The Messenger of Allah never saw me except that he smiled at me." Smiling is of various types and of different levels. One type is to be constantly cheerful, where your face is always bright with joy. If you are a teacher and enter the classroom to see your students, meet them with a cheerful face. If you board a plane and walk through the aisle as people look at you, be cheerful. If you enter a grocery store or a petrol station, smile as you pay. If you are in a gathering and there enters a man who greets those sitting with a loud voice and gazes at them, smile. If you meet a group of people and shake their hands, smile. Generally speaking, smiling plays an important role in suppressing anger and doubt like nothing else does. A brave man is he who is able to control his emotions and smile in the darkest of moments. One day, Anas bin Malik – may Allah be pleased with him – was walking with the Prophet . The Prophet was wearing a Najrani mantle with rough edging. There came a Bedouin running behind the Prophet , wanting to catch up with him. When he got close to the Prophet, he pulled him aggressively by his mantle, such that the mantle rubbed hard against his neck. Anas said, "I looked at the Prophet's neck and noticed a mark due to the edge of his mantle being so roughly pulled across his neck." So what exactly did the man want? Was his house burning down and he wanted help? Had the pagans attacked his people, and he turned to the Prophet horrified, seeking his aid? Read what he actually wanted… He said, "O Muhammad!"(Note, he didn't say, "O Messenger of Allah.") Rather he said, "O Muhammad! Give me some of the wealth that Allah has given you!" The Prophet turned around, smiled, and ordered that he be given something. Yes, he was heroic - he was one who would not be agitated by such behaviour, nor would he punish people over brainless actions. He was easygoing and strong enough to maintain his composure. He was always smiling, even in the darkest of moments. He would consider the consequences before performing any action. What would the benefit have been to have shouted at the man and driven him away? Would that have made his neck feel better? Would it have corrected the man's manners? Never! It never would have had the same effect as patience and forbearance. Smile and keep smiling Sometimes we become excited and angry over issues that deserve a different approach. We should treat such issues with gentleness, leniency, and a smiling. We ought to think good of others, quash our fury and, ultimately, earn people's pleasure. The Prophet was certainly correct when he said, "The strong man is not the one who is best at wrestling.