91. Be brave and start from now! (cont.)

I only did Choose the right topics what I did to assist you with some money! How wonderful these manners were! He chose the appropriate topic to discuss with the young man, and when he decided to help him, he did so with great kindness and compassion. One day, a young man called Julaybib was sitting next to the Prophet . He was one of the best Companions but was poor and not very good looking. Which topic did the Prophet  raise with this young man, who was still unmarried? Did he discuss Arab lineages and which of them are nobler than others? Did he discuss the markets and the laws governing sales? No. Rather, he was a young man who preferred certain topics over others. Hence, the Prophet  asked him about marriage. Julaybib replied, “You will find me unmarketable.” The Prophet  replied, “You are not so in the sight of Allah.” While the Prophet  was looking to get Julaybib married, there came to him a man from the Ansaar offering his previously married daughter to him in marriage. The Prophet  said, “I want to have your daughter married.” The man replied, “Most, definitely, O Messenger of Allah!” The Prophet  said, “Actually, I don’t want her for myself.” “For whom then?” the man asked. “For Julaybib” said the Prophet . The man became surprised and said, “Julaybib! Julaybib! O Messenger of Allah, allow me to ask her mother.” The man went to his wife and said, “The Prophet  is pro18 Choose the right topics posing to your daughter.” She said, “How wonderful! Marry her off to the Messenger of Allah.” He said, “He doesn’t want her for himself.” “For whom then?” she asked? He said, “For Julaybib.” The woman was shocked at the idea of her daughter being married to an ugly poor man. She said, “Never! I swear I will not allow her to marry Julaybib! We haven’t given her in marriage to so many others!” The father was saddened. As he got up to leave to inform the Prophet , the girl shouted from her room, “Who proposed for me?” They said, “The Messenger of Allah.” She said, “Are you rejecting the Prophet’s request? Send me to him, for he shall certainly not bring ruin to me.” Thereafter, her father went to the Prophet  and said, “O Messenger of Allah, the choice is yours, so marry her off to Julaybib if so you wish.” The Prophet  married her off to Julaybib and prayed for them, “O Lord, bestow good on them in abundance and make not their life one of toil and trouble.” It wasn’t long before the Prophet  went out on an expedition with Julaybib accompanying him. After the battle, people began searching for those missing. The Prophet  asked them, “Have you lost anyone?” They said, “I have lost so-and-so.” He remained silent for a while and then asked again, “Are you missing anyone?” They said, “We are missing so-and-so.” He remained Choose the right topics silent for a while and then asked again, “Have you lost anyone?” and they replied, “Yes, so-and-so.” The Prophet  then said, “I have lost Julaybib.” The Companions began to search for him amongst the dead but did not find him on the battlefield.They then found him nearby, next to seven pagans whom he had killed before being killed himself. The Prophet  stood watching his body and said, “He killed seven and then he was killed. He killed seven and then he was killed. He is of me and I am of him.” The Prophet  took him in his arms and ordered the Companions to dig a grave for him. Anas said, “As we dug the grave, Julaybib was resting in the arms of Allah’s Messenger , until the grave was dug and he placed Julaybib in it. By Allah, there was no previously married woman amongst the Ansaar who received more proposals after that than Julaybib’s wife.” This is how the Prophet  would decide on the appropriate topic of conversation, so as to not bore his guests. One day, he was sitting with his wife ‘A’ishah. What would be the most appropriate subject to talk about with one’s wife? Did he speak to her about the expedition of Rome? The types of weapons used in battles? No, for she was not Abu Bakr. Did he speak to her about poor Muslims and their needs? No, for she was not ‘Uthman. Rather, he said to her, lovingly, “I know when you are pleased with me and when you are angry.” “How is that?” She replied He said, “When you are pleased you say: ‘No, by the Lord of Muhammad! And when you are angry you say: ‘No, by the Lord Choose the right topics of Ibrahim!’’ She said, “Yes, by Allah, O Messenger of Allah! But I do not put aside anything except your name!” Do we take these factors into consideration today? A point of view...