5. Would you like to meet him outside the institution? (cont.)

After the lecture, one of them came to me and said, “Dear Shaykh, I need your help regarding a very important matter.” I said, “Go ahead, what is it?” He said, “I cannot tell you now, but we must meet again when we have more time.” He was speaking as if the matter was very important as I listened with interest. My life has taught me that many people give a lot more importance to issues than they deserve. This person who came to me was fanatical about his problem. He said to me, “I think you have a lecture tomorrow in such-and-such a city.” The city was about 200 km from Riyadh. “Yes”, I replied. He said, “I will come to see you there and meet up with you Do not burden yourself with what you cannot do after your lecture.” I was stunned at his eagerness. As I left after delivering the lecture, he came after me in a hurry, barefoot, with a small piece of paper in his hand. I stood by his side and said, “Go ahead. May Allah reward you for your eagerness, but what do you need?” He said, “Dear Shaykh, I have a brother who only has primary education certificate, and I would like you to find him a job.” I said, “Is that it?” He said, “Yes, that’s it.” The man seemed really keen and his appearance made me pity him. It seemed as though his brother was going through a rough period. However, I knew that if I promised him anything, I would not have been able to keep it. We are living in times where one with a bachelor’s degree cannot find work, let alone someone with a primary education certificate. I knew the limits of what I could do. It was an embarrassing moment for me, and I wished that I really could do something to help this grieving person’s need. However, I literally was able to do nothing, so I said to him, “Dear brother, by Allah, I want to help you. Your brother is my brother. I feel for him as you do. However, I am not able to help you at all. I hope you can graciously excuse me.” He said, “Dear Shaykh, please, at least try.” I said, “I am sorry, I cannot.” He then gave me the piece of paper in his hand and said, “Okay, dear Shaykh, just take this piece of paper with our phone numbers. If you ever find a job, please give us a ring.” I realised Do not burden yourself with what you cannot do that he still wished to have hope in me. I knew that if I took the numbers, he would continuously wait for my call, pin his hopes, and encourage his brother to do the same. I said, “Actually, keep the piece of paper and take my number down, and if you find a job for him then please give me a call. Perhaps, I will write a recommendation letter to the employer for him to be accepted.” The man remained silent for a while as I waited for him to say goodbye. I was surprised when he then said to me, “May Allah brighten your face! By Allah, dear Shaykh, I have previously spoken to Prince so-and-so about the matter a year ago. He took the piece of paper and still hasn’t called me! Once I spoke to Major General so-and-so, and he too took the piece of paper and didn’t call me or even care about me. These people do not care about the weak! Allah will seek revenge from them!” When he began to pray against them, I thought to myself, “Al-Hamdulillah, if I had taken the piece of paper, I would have been the third person to be prayed against!” Yes, to excuse oneself from the outset is to keep one’s promise. How excellent it is to be straightforward with people, knowing and acknowledging the limits of what one can do. This does not only apply to people’s needs in general, but also to small needs involving the wife or the children. Sometimes, as you leave the house, your wife shouts out, “Please, buy milk, sugar and tonight’s dinner!” Be careful and do not keep repeating, “OK, I will”, knowing that you are not able to. Rather, you should call out to her, saying, “I cannot”, for this is better than making excuses upon your Do not burden yourself with what you cannot do return, such as, “I didn’t have time… The shops closed… I forgot…” The same applies to your colleagues and brothers. I hope you get the idea. Experience… Excusing oneself at the outset is far better than excusing oneself at the end. Do not burden yourself with what you cannot do (63) Who kicked the cat? Before you answer this question, read the story in full. A person used to work as a secretary for a very ill-mannered manager who did not have a single skill of dealing with people.